No honeymoon period lasts forever. I was lucky to have had more than two months of utter bliss, or blissful ignorance.
I was left with my mouth hanging and eyes wide open. It was incredulous. I chatted to the affected person and we both felt discouraged. I guess we were disillusioned.
I had to process this little something in my brain after a small rant to an external soul. I hope not to talk about it with my girl friends, no matter how tempting. It is a trivial thing… that some people did to feel better about that probable nagging feeling of imminent futility.
I contemplated on bringing it up to a higher authority. However, by bedtime, having silenced my ego, I realized that it’s best to leave it alone. For now. The time will come. The opportunity will come. After all, I have a life. I have a purposeful life (I think… I hope, ha-ha!) outside the four walls of the headquarters. I shall not descend to the tactics of those who are merely killing time.
I got to thinking how important it is to have a life.
I used to find significance and my usefulness in my career life. I always took pride in my work. When my son was young, he used to say that what I was really good at was work. It did not offend me. It was a compliment. I admitted that I kind of sucked at life.
So, I worked hard. I made work the most important thing in my life. I was convinced that my purpose in life had something to do with my work. Even when my dream changed from wanting to become a CEO or some sort of executive, work dominated my life. I saw me as a businesswoman. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People changed my mind about the corporate world, but I had my focus on entrepreneurship.
I don’t know when it happened, but it occurred to me one day that perhaps my purpose had nothing to do with my work itself but with the relationship I form and keep with people I meet at my work place. More recently, I was more content in my career life because I accepted that my purpose is outside of my work. Work is necessary. I don’t work less, and my good work ethics remain, but I do not expect work to complete me and be the reason for living. I do not need the prestigious position anymore.
I am happy being an average Jane at work because I know that I make the significant difference in my life outside of work. I have worthwhile relationships with people, in my world of writing and outside of it. The daily challenges work brings are more palatable because I like my family and social life a lot.
I may not know exactly what my life purpose is, but I am happy enough having a real life. Yes, I do have a life and it is good!
It is a wonderful life, outside of my good enough work, in my world of words and in the world I share with family, friends and loved ones. Cheers!